(Get ready folks--this is a long one.)
In an attempt to get us out of our gloomy and dark house, literally and figuratively--it's been overcast and raining pretty steady for a few days now--I hauled the crazies to a fairly Podunk children's museum by my mom's house. We met up with the significantly-less-crazy cousins and the kids had a good time.
Other than the fact that the entire time I fought the urge to whip out my Lysol wipes from the car and coat everything in there with a thick layer of antibacterial solution, the kids had a fun time. Oh, and I can't forget the mysteriously and apparently orphaned red headed kid that kept running around terrorizing all the other kids.
At one point, a 5 or 6 year old boy dressed in a gigantic pilots helmet and mask came running over to me and Dee seeking mercy and hoping that we would discipline the red headed terror that was quite literally hanging his entire body's weight on the back of the helmet in an attempt to rip it (and the kid's head) off. I asked the bigger kid getting decapitated if he knew the red kid, if maybe it was his little brother? (It really did look like a typical sibling squabble.) "NO!" he shouted in pain and frustration. I was very proud that he didn't just haul off and hit the little red headed kid to get him off because he was starting to sound and look like he was in alot of pain.
So in an attempt to save the Pilot, I put the smack down on the demon kid and said, "Hey there. I think you need to wait your turn. It's pretty clear that the kid with his head IN the helmet was wearing it first." He looked at me, gave me the famous kid Stink Eye, then took off wailing and flailing around the place in a tantrum spiral to find his invisible authority figure who remained MIA the entire time we were there. The whole thing was hysterical looking--I really wish I could've gotten my phone camera out in time.
They added a new sandbox for dinosaur excavation. I'm getting so good y'all--I barely even broke a sweat about all the little sand granules that were EVERYWHERE. Alex even found some in his bed from where Aidan had taken his nap several hours later. I'm washing lots of sheets today. They have this airplane that I'm pretty sure used to really fly, but now it's pretty hollowed out with some kid chairs and controls in it. It rocks side to side and the kids love it. It's highly probable they could get lead poisoning or some deep laceration or something from it, but WHAT FUN!
When me and Dee couldn't stand the filthy, dusty floors that kept making everyone slip and fall anymore, we loaded them all back up and took them for lunch at Chickalay. "GO. EAT. PLAY." They did. We did. Then ice cream cones and we hit the road again.
Avery fell asleep for the last 10 minutes of the drive. I thought he transferred to his bed ok, but he never did go back to sleep. THIS IS WHERE TUESDAY STARTED REALLY STINKING. For the next 2 hours, he kept sneaking out of his room and I kept putting him back in. I knew I'd be in for it later if he didn't get a nap. For you see, Tuesdays are a bit crazy. Alex has piano from 4:30-5:30. But it's a ways away, so me and the little crazies just try to go do something nearby for an hour. But then he has football practice at 6:30 right by piano and that doesn't leave us enough time to get home, get him changed, and then back. Not to mention get everyone fed dinner. So after piano, I have to find something to do for another hour involving feeding dinner to all 4 crazies.
Right before we left, the boys crumbled about 3 cans worth of playdoh and threw it all over the kitchen. FINE! NO MORE PLAYDOH! EVER! It'll be all dried up and we'll vacuum it up later. We took off at 4:10, got Alex to piano, and then we hurried off to try to find some new church pants at Old Navy for the rapidly growing twin crazies. I pushed a cart with a kid, and then made the mistake of letting Maddie push a cart with a kid. You'd think after being a mom for almost 9 years, I would've learned by now... NEVER let a kid behind you with a cart. I've learned this the hard way many times. But yesterday's took the cake.
I promise I don't have a misshapen, elephantitis foot--it was just a really weird iPhone camera angle. Plus i was in pain and dripping blood all down the back of my foot, so GIMME A BREAK. Luckily, the trip was not in vain and I managed to find navy pants for the boys (although probably now blood-stained) and even got a killer deal--<$4 each on the clearance rack. Sweet. Almost worth the shredded Achilles tendon.
I tied on a tourniquet and drove back to pick up Alex. We went into Subway to get the kids a huge footlong sandwich to share and hopefully waste some time before football. The kids were TERRIBLE. Running around, grabbing bags of chips, playing in the drink fridge, and generally acting like hooligans. Luckily they actually ate and then I reloaded them back in the car (but not before chasing the boys in opposite directions up and down the sidewalk of the strip mall with me hollering about their bad choices and threatening timeouts).
Alex changed into all his giant pads and helmet and we drove over to his field. He looks like a giant bobble head in all that stuff with his tiny toothpick legs underneath. We were 15 minutes early so they got to watch some Bugs Bunny in the car. Thank heavens for that built in DVD player. I was initially going to drop him off, and Jeremy was going to pick him up later, but I could tell when no one was going out on the totally soggy fields that they weren't probably going to have practice. So I stuck around hoping that they'd cancel it quickly due to the uber-wet fields, and we'd be outta there.
But no. I was parked kinda far away but could see them all just standing around in lines. So I locked the little crazies in the car (don't call CPS--I cracked the windows), ran over to find out what was up, then ran back. They were supposedly just measuring them for their uniforms. I figured 15 minutes at most, then I could take the circus home for bed.
Nope. 45 FREAKING MINUTES LATER we were still sitting there. I hadn't brought much of anything because I hadn't planned on staying and entertaining the crazies so they were losing it fast--3 bananas, 1/2 granola bar, and a tube of chapstick don't go far. I was about to go grab Alex regardless of if he was measured or not, but luckily he came trotting up to the car just then. Can I just tell you how happy everyone was after being trapped in the car for over an HOUR? And after having been dragged around for the past 3 hours? Napless Avery was PSYCHO and babbling incoherently while crying about Backyardigans and pacifiers.
Then I finally got home (Oh, hello playdoh mess!) hoping to find some good news or any news on the answering machine about Loren. Nothing still. I may call her cell phone for an update--I'm debating if that is appropriate or not. Thoughts? I would hate to call and interrupt or catch them at a terrible time. Hmm.
But I did find a fat bill in the mail from stupid Enterprise for the "damage" I supposedly inflicted on the crappy rental car from June. Get this--they are saying we owe them $722.63 for the slightly scratched door that WAS THAT WAY WHEN I PICKED UP THE CAR. Holy Moly. I'm letting the one in the family that gets paid to argue handle that one.
Then the owner of the rental house from the reunion emails and says he's keeping half our deposit because his house cleaners said there were "puddles of urine" in 2 bathrooms, that someone wet one of the beds downstairs, and there were "spills in the fridge." UM WHAT?! For one thing, there were no urine puddles. I checked each and every bathroom in that giant house and no urine puddles. Jeremy's sister and I cleaned that place to a decent degree before we left--not perfectly clean--because I knew that we had paid a $300 cleaning fee and he was going to have a crew coming in to clean and remake all the beds anyway. We vacuumed, did all the dishes, cleaned all the counters, stripped all the beds, and dragged all the towels and linens to the laundry room for them. I even went around for an hour and wiped all the walls down to get off any hand or finger prints. Um, I'm kinda embarrassed to admit that I even vacuumed the lint trap on the dryer and washed down the washing machine. $300 doesn't cover them wiping out the fridge?
As for someone wetting one of the beds, that probably happened. There were alot of kids down there and I'm sure one of them peed without telling anyone. Fine. We'll pay for whatever "specialty cleaning products" that you had to buy, but come on. Seriously. Did your cleaning crew also let you know that the entire 1/2 acre surrounding the house was weeded and cleaned up? That was Grandpa's service project with the grandkids. He had them out there for hours hacking and pulling giant weeds. Alex got a bit obsessed and spent at least an hour a day alone out there weeding. Their reward for hard work--a trip "into town" to get milkshakes. Did the housecleaners mention THAT? Grrr....