Now that I got that outta the way, I can finally justify plopping down at the computer to add some pictures from last week to the blog. And yes, I am aware that my picture reveals that I watch that ridiculously caddy and brainless show on Bravo. Anyone recognize this episode? There's nothing like fake nails, gargantuan silicone implants, and nasty cat fights to make the workout fly by. Looking at that picture, it seems like the tv is mounted on the elliptical. It's not--we didn't spring for the pimped out model--it's about four feet away on a dresser. Paying for that extra satellite hookup in there was soooo worth it. I'm still deciding what color to repaint the exercise room--I'm open to suggestions. Any ideas on what camouflages a giant machine?
I feel like these pictures were from a month ago. It's been a long week. The little crazies AND the big crazies have conspired to be completely cranky and unruly all week long--about everything and anything. I've had it up to here (picture me flailing my hand as high as physically possible above my head) with all the fighting, teasing, whining, crying, tattling, and general kid drama. I might just start wearing my ipod around the house so I can selectively listen and tune out the rest with much happier noises. Even as I type this, Aidan is crying and pulling on my legs screaming that he wants to go to Target. I don't know why exactly, but he has it in his head that he has GOT to get there right now or he will burst into flames right here by my desk. Maybe they're having a good sale on fruit snacks or basketballs or something.
Back to last week. Before the wedding, all the ladies (me, mom, grandma, my other brother's wife Dee, the bride-to-be, and the maid of honor) all went to the spa to pamper our phalanges. Luckily, the appointments happened to coincide with Sonic's happy hour. Pure joy.
See--much prettier. And yes, I even went to dinner wearing those styrofoam bad boys because I forgot to bring my own non-toe-smooshing shoes.
And maybe those ladies from my show aren't surgically "enhanced" after all---perhaps they just used ALOT of this stuff. Maybe like gallons. And someone should tell the model that the only reason her bust appears more lush is because she's arching her back in such an extremely awkward and exaggerated position. Dee was brave enough to stand with me in the middle of the swanky spa lobby while I whipped out my giant camera to take a shot of this stuff. She said I looked like a tourist. That's what I'm going to tell people from now on when they give me weird looks for taking pictures of random stuff. "I'm just visiting. I'm from outta town. Back off."
The rehearsal and dinner was the perfect opportunity to prove the rest of the family wrong about the reality of my crazies' craziness. Unfortunately, they did not. They were in FULL crazy Friday night. However, Grandpa is responsible for instigating and provoking the shenanigans after the rehearsal while we were waiting to leave for the restaurant. He had all the grandkids riled up and was giving them foot rides all over the place. The foot rides just led to generally wild behavior, complete with wrestling and tag.
And the proof regarding who takes the genetic blame for my freakishly flat hiney has been proven beyond a shadow of a doubt with this photo documentation. The girls thought it would be funny to pants grandpa--so did I.
The girl cousins fought the entire time over who got to hold the "bouquet" and prance around with it.
My nephew James kickin' it with his great-granny. You can tell he's really scared of new people.
About two hours after we started dinner, it was finally the time the kids had been waiting for the entire night--dessert. Chocolate thunder from down under---which is super delicious, but could not possibly have a more poo-poo sounding name.
Aidan and Avery were "sharing" with me--which basically meant I was defending myself from the chocolate syrup and ice cream that they were flinging off of their spoons while fighting over bites. I think I managed to sneak in two bites. And that's Alex's "hey--that's not fair!" face when he saw that Jeremy scored a slice of Nutter Butter Cheesecake all to himself.
Wedding day pics to come later. I have been inundated with neighborhood kids and Aidan just dumped a dish of red jello 0n the carpet. Fun times.