Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Ramblings: His Royal Highness

In case you were wondering...

His Royal Highness requires 600 thread count sheets and a velvet pillow for naptime. It's only upon this throne that he can achieve total comfort in his "freeze dirtbag" body position, arms thrown skyhigh like he's being arrested by the SWAT team.
I prefer not to think that it's the comforting squishiness that reminds him of the squishiness of my midsection as I snuggle him.  But I'm pretty sure it is. Oh well. It'll be around for awhile.
Doesn't he look GIANT for a 6 week old? Yup. Today's the prince's 6 week birthday. And now he's requiring his supper.

Monday, November 15, 2010

Raves: Last year's Christmas faves

Every year about this time, I panic because I've got to think of things to get the kids for Christmas. Things that will actually get used--not just stuffed in some closet or abandoned in the garage.  So looking back to last year, I'll give you my faves and their faves in case you're stumped too.  But I will require some ideas in return! Help a sista out. Anything that can be purchased online instead of having to drag children into stores where they will beg and whine and throw tantrums gets brownie points.

1. For kids five and older (given to Alex--although coveted and occasionally stolen by Aidan):
The Razor Rip-Rider. Cheapest at amazon. The back wheels spin completely around so that you can go really fast and then turn and spin and do all sorts of cool and semi-dangerous tricks. Alex has almost completely worn the wheel down in a year's time becuase it's gotten so much use. Three reasons I love it: it's an outside toy, it's exercise, and it's not electronic. That last one is really difficult to fulfill because it seems all toys and gifts geared to a 10 year old are electronic games, gaming systems, gadgets for those games, etc.
2. The toys that the boys have played with the most: Fisher Price GeoTrax. We got both the railroad and the airplane tracks. They link together so you can be running the trains and the airplanes at the same time. Which in my house = less fighting over the remotes. Super fun, although they take up some significant floor space. We usually have them out and running for a couple of weeks at a time, then they get put away for a break. Fun part: you can buy all sorts of different tracks and trains to add to the set to change it up. So far it seems that ToysRus gets the biggest variety around Christmas, though you can find them on Amazon and at Target as well.
3. Fun for all: Arcade style basketball. We actually got this awhile after Christmas, but it would've made for a great Christmas morning gift. Avery has to tip toe to reach the ball return, but that doesn't slow him down. It took Jeremy about a year to assemble, but after all the effort, it was worth it. Even adults have thrown down some serious competitive shooting on this thing. It keeps score, will time you, and is great for indoor play.  We got ours on the Costco website but you can find it other places too. Minus: Serious area required for this bad boy. We had to rearrange our big playroom to fit this in the back corner. Fits fine, but plan on it being bigger than you thought. Also could be used in a garage if you don't live somewhere where the summer's are like being dropped into a pot of boiling lava. 

4. For ages 3 and up: Melissa and Doug Slice and Bake Cookie set. Given to Maddie but played with by the boys also. The different pieces velcro together so you can stick them to the pan and then change up the decorations on top. You can pretend to cut the dough that velcros together and slides in the tube. She also got an Easy Bake Oven which she loves, but this is something she can do that is great for creative play and there's no mess or parental involvement required.


That's all for now, but I'll add to this if I think of more later! Any good ideas for me? Let me know!

And just for fun: **Much too expensive and NOT available at stores near you**
Trace says hello.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Ramblings: Making Dad Proud and other random stuff

Overheard from the very back of the minivan where the twins have been relocated.

Aidan: Hey Avery, pretend I'm a transformer.
Avery: Your mom is a transformer.


In other news...the big kids came home with their school pictures. Not too bad as far as those uber-staged, "tilt your head at this exact angle" photo sessions go.  Maddie got her hair chopped the night before. She keeps trying to inch it shorter and shorter every haircut. Grandmas--your copies will be in the mail soon.


My birthday is next week and Jeremy's is the week after so we're sneaking away for a couple days this weekend. Once again we drugged the drinking water in these here parts and got Grandma to agree to pinch hit (or get pinched and hit) while we're gone. The bigs will get to go spend Friday night at their favorite getaway in the world--Uncle Greg and Aunt Brooke's--where the candy and cupcakes flow like a river and there are two bulldog bellies to scratch.

Trace will tag along with us and we'll reminisce about how easy it is (and was along time ago) to  travel with only one. Still trying to decide what spa items to choose while we're at the resort...I'm pretty sure no matter which one I choose, I'll fall asleep and miss the entire thing.

Oh, and your mom is a transformer.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Ramblings: Proof of Life

I've started about 20 posts and then by the time I get back to sit and try to finish them, they seem obsolete so I trash them. But I'm alive. I promise. No seriously. I am.  And here are some shots via iphone to prove it. They were taken in the spot I reside most of the day and night it seems. One of the chairs in my room where I sit to feed Trace--conveniently pointed directly at my DVR and tv for those 3 AM feedings. Because thankfully I only need to watch most infomercials once or twice before I'm amazed anyone would buy the bizarre products advertised in the wee hours of the morning. Although in my sleepy, half-awake stupor, I'm tempted to call and chat it up with whomever it is that actually takes those customer endorsement phone calls. I could spin them quite a tale...hey, a person's got to keep herself entertained, you know?

And how is it that I can inhale a pile of Halloween candy at one middle of the night feeding and not even realize it? First Halloween, then Thanksgiving, and then Christmas!? I picked a bad time of year to be attempting to shed ALOT of post-baby lbs. No, wait! Better idea! Does Santa own a liposuction needle?

So it's been a month...what have we been up to around here?
Lots of baby snuggling. Lots of baby feeding. Lots of me saying "DON'T TOUCH THE BABY! You are NOT clean!" (Mostly to the kids--only sometimes to Jeremy :)  Lots of me trying to figure out how to sit and feed the baby without the other hooligans getting away with murder. Lots of not finding a solution to that.
We also enjoyed spending an evening in downtown Dallas at the huge Diwali Mela festival that one of Jeremy's clients is in charge of every year. Jeremy pigged out on Indian food. The kids opted for Corn Dogs. The kids climbed a climbing wall all the way up but decided NOT to ride the elephants. Jeremy's got the pics on his phone--I'll have to add them later. Funniest quote of the day was by Maddie when we sat down to eat: "Mom. We are the whitest people here." And we were. And it was a fun time.

Then we enjoyed Halloween. (Trace wore this onesie from Auntie Brooke.)
Does it count as "carving" if you just stick in the parts? I got lazy and when the boys wanted to carve pumpkins, I decided a pirate Mr. Potato Head was the way to go. Plus, no stringy pumpkin guts to clean up, and our pumpkin will survive a little longer in the 80* weather .
We went to the firm Halloween party at Jeremy's office. It would've been way more fun if we wouldn't have gotten stuck in construction traffic--turning the 30 minute drive into an 1 1/2 long journey with the kids screaming every 15 seconds from the back "AUGGHH! How much longer? WHEN are we going to get there? Is there going to be any candy left?"  Aidan was a werewolf--but he was really annoyed that people kept thinking he was a bear. (MY fault--his costume was too big so it didn't fit quite right.)  He was really ticked that he lost his vampire teeth, because he said if he had sharp teeth then people would know he was a werewolf. Avery was a dragon "that shoots things from his claws." Whatever that means. Maddie was an Italian chef and Alex was Dr. Pepper. I don't think I ended up with any pictures of Maddie. (Mom of the year, I know.) Alex wore scrubs and a white coat with a nametag that said "Pepper M.D."  
Here we are in Jeremy's office. The boys raided the bowl that his nice assistant Natalie left for them in fear that all the candy would really be gone by the time we showed up.  I was marveling at how messy his office was--and now that it's bigger, the mess just gets more and more spread out. (Yup--that's his Ronald Reagan picture that's finally gotten a place on the wall after being stashed in his other office for five years. Right there above his 2, yeah TWO, computer monitors side by side that he feels are necessary for some reason.  Did anyone see The Office episode with Dwight's Mega-Desk?)

He looks so cute and peaceful, right? Little did we know that in five seconds after this was taken, Trace would perform his first poo-poo blow out. He saved it all up for dad's office.  And I, being Mom of the year, only had an extra onesie--no pants. So he got swaddled in that blue blanket and taken home without his "costume."

This past Sunday we blessed Trace at our church. I have to say I like the family picture better with an odd number. Six just looked off balance. Seven works much better. Until Trace is old enough to squirm and then picture-taking will get really interesting. We're all a little squinty in the morning sun. And I think the boys were being distracted by their cousin Sydney.
It's pretty unanimous among everyone he meets that Trace looks the most like Aidan. Especially now that his hair's falling out and his head is getting big and round and bald. Aidan loves it. I do too--because I was beginning to think Aidan may grow up with some sort of complex not looking like any of the other kids. Now he has a little buddy.

Off to pick up the boys from preschool. Trace has been good about being hauled to and fro in his carseat. His poor little bum better get used to it.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Rave: D(elivery) Day

The day finally came. Finally. Fi-na-lly. We arrived at the hospital this morning in the dark, wee hours of the morning for our 8:30 c-section. And at 8:46, the doctor pulled out a squirmy 7 lb. 10 oz., 20 inch long little dude with reddish brown, slightly wavy hair. I will say that it felt more like I had been carrying around a 17 pounder, but even under the spinal anesthesia, it felt like a giant weight was wrangled right out of me.

After some minor harassment, they got him crying so he'd cough up some amniotic fluid that he'd accidentally swallowed. And that's about the last time we've heard him cry all day. He's a content, calm little man. He just wakes up and looks around. This was taken shortly after he was born--he already knew how to find his thumb and lodge it in his mouth. He's been doing it all day--I love it because it looks so cute even though I'll probably regret it when the orthodontic bills come rolling in one day.

So he'll sleep, suck his thumb a little, eat like a champ for as long as I'll let him and then quietly go back to sleep. We're hoping this is a pattern that continues....we shall see.  I, however, am not a content LITTLE anything. I'm swollen to 18 times anything that could be considered normal size and my carpal tunneled-arms and my exploding polska kielbasa feet are about to pop and feel like they're stuck in a red hot flaming fire. Six i.v. bags of fluid in a six hour period will do that, I guess.  I hope this is a pattern that DOESN'T continue for long.

And now I'm off to try to sleep in between being poked, prodded, and having the amount of my pee measured. Sheesh. Child bearing forces you to lose any sense of dignity. Sure janitor, come on in and empty my trash while all my business is exposed. No big whoop. Invite your friends, we'll have a party.

Here are some bad cell phone pics of the new guy  a few minutes old. We forgot our memory card reader for our camera so those pics will be coming later...

Trace Bowen Fielding
(No--it's not Tres or Traze or Tre$--he's not a rapper. At least not yet...)


Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Ramblings: A real page turner

While in the waiting area picking my mom up from a medical "procedure" on her back, I had some time to flip through a few magazines. The first to catch my eye was of course:
(How could I not be drawn to that beauty, right?)
Is this a Texas thing? Although I've lived here a long time, I think this is the first time I've encountered this particular periodical in any doctor's office. I have seen plenty of livestock-related materials, but never a monthly magazine dedicated solely to rifles. Or the men that love their rifles. I'm thinking about writing a letter to the editor, posing as a female rifle-enthusiast that is put off by their sexist magazine title. But that would make me a feminist rifle-enthusiast and I'm pretty sure they'd know I was lying then. I'm guessing there aren't too many of those chicas running around. Well, they're probably not running. I pretty sure you shouldn't run around while you're busy being enthusiastic about and/or with your rifle.

But then I found an article in some whacky health food magazine that was music to my ears...er, eyes I guess, since I was reading. 

Umm, what kind of crazy person would choose a deep-fried twinkie over that fine, fluffy ball of freshly-spun pinkalicious tastiness?And NO FAT. Lovely.

But then the receptionist interrupted my cotton-candy daydream with, "Oh! You must be due anyday now!"

And then I had to pick up the magazine with the giant picture of a weapon and hurl it at her as a weapon. So maybe I am the first Pregnant feminist American Riflewoman; subtitled: "With Anger Issues--You Got a Problem With That?"

And yes, if you live down here in the South--where we love both our rifles AND more importantly, our cotton candy--check out what you can find now.
Yeah, that's right. Blue Bell--the undeniable RULER of all ice cream makers--has created a cotton candy flavor. And those others don't look so bad either.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Rant: Because I needed another reason...

A factual fairy tale for your amusement...


Once upon a time there was a large whale-like princess that waddled around her castle while trying to keep her unruly subjects in order. Or at least attempted to keep them off of tall and/or dangerous furniture. Her body was constantly sore and her belly was LARGE. And throughout the night, because the whale-like physique encroached so much on her bladder's territory, she waddled off to the bathroom at least three times in the darkness. Seriously. Dark. Helen Keller style--no lights necessary. The routine occurred in complete darkness because as anyone else that's been whale-like knows, completely waking up in the middle of the night is a dangerous proposition. The whale-like princess may NEVER get back to sleep, no matter how exhausted or tired she may be.

But last night was different. At her midnight  potty-break, she stepped into the bathroom and immediately felt a stabbing pain in her foot. Half-awake, in shock, and fumbling for the light switch, she contemplated what might have caused such pain. Perhaps one of the loose tiles finally shattered and a jagged shard was protruding from the arch of her foot. Perhaps one of the unruly subjects set a booby trap, attempting to ensnare their wicked task-master.  But what it really felt like was a hypodermic needle being shoved about two inches into her foot. Though the princess was fairly certain no sloppy diabetics or i.v. drug users were hanging out by her toilet at midnight.

So the whale princess finally flipped on the lights and after her eyes cleared, she looked down and saw a very dazed and flittering wasp on the floor. (Can you blame him? He just got stepped on by a whale.) And indeed, her foot was already turning red and swelling around the needlepoint sized dot in the arch of her foot. And then it began to sting. Alot. And then it throbbed. Alot. And the princess still had to pee. Alot. But for fear that the wasp might still decide to attack again, she couldn't risk using that bathroom and so she hobbled out into the hall. And maybe she was cursing that wasp under her breath. Just a little.

But remembering the hall bathroom was out of toilet paper because the rebellious subjects hadn't obeyed and replaced the roll, all the princess could do was stand and holler. Luckily, the prince had just rolled into the castle.

(Did the princess mention the prince is in trial this week? Meaning he's been absent around the castle since sometime last week. Including the entire weekend which REALLY ticked the princess off. And he sneaks in at weird hours and then leaves a very cranky princess in the wee morning hours.) Little does the prince know, he may find that his key and garage opener don't work by the end of this week.

But luckily the whale-princess's hollers brought the prince running because he thought the princess was in labor. Apparently she had PAIN in her voice--whether from the incredibly growing mass of a foot or from having to go the bathroom so badly--we will never know. And so the prince squashed the evil villain and the princess finally got to pee. (A new spin on the Princess and the Pea.) And yes, as if the princess didn't have enough trouble sleeping through the night due to the impossibility of finding any comfortable position with her whale belly, now she had to endure a foot that felt as if it was on fire.

And so today, the tired princess is hobbling and waddling around with one very inflamed and painful foot. Because she needed another reason to have a bad attitude and to walk funny. (I just googled "swollen feet" to try to find a funny picture. TRUST ME. I am doing you a favor by not showing any--most of them were really nasty.)

And so the princess and the 2 little subjects that have yet to start preschool (2 more weeks), are headed off (full of SPITE with REVENGE on the mind) to buy lots of this:

The whale princess has decreed: DEATH TO ALL WASPS.

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Ramblings: Dreamers

On the 40 minute drive to my doctor's appointment yesterday:

Alex: (LOUDLY voicing his unhappiness about my deejaying skills for the 50th time) MOM! Turn in to channel 6. I hate your songs. They're so weird.
Me: Alex, when you have your own car you can listen to whatever songs you want.  And if I ride with you, I'll probably hate all of your songs.
Aidan: Mom, when I get big, can I get a car?
Me: Yes. Probably.
Aidan: Will it be this car? (the minivan)
Me: I'm pretty sure you won't want to drive this minivan in 12 years.
Aidan: Avery, did you hear that? We get cars. What kind of car are you going to get? I'm going to get a fighting car. With knives (or knights--I couldn't understand him) and fire (painted flames) all over it for fighting.
Think this:
Or this.
Avery: Yeah, I will get a fast car and I will drive SO fast. But not too crazy or the policeman will get me. But as fast as a big truck with a big engine. (the kid is obsessed with engines and why some cars go faster than others.)

Avery almost suffered an excitement-induced hernia when he saw this GIANT engine.
Aidan: Avery, probably you will want to ride with me because I have "Beat It" (Michael Jackson) in my car. And Michael Buble. And we will listen to those songs. And we can drive to Mexico. (what?)
Me: Actually, you guys will probably have to share a car.
--Stunned silence for a few seconds while they digest that they will have to make the impossible choice between a SO fast car and a fighting car for their Mexican vacation--
Aidan: Avery, can I drive when we are sharing a car? I'm a good driver. I know all the pedals.
Avery: Yeah, ok. I will drive sometimes.
Aidan: Ok.

Whew! I'm glad we got those plans all worked out. Then it started raining HARD and the conversation evolved into how windshield wipers work and how tires can drive with water on the ground.  My brain was hurting when we finally got there. Answering questions and explaining things so that 4 year olds will understand is fairly exhausting.

Jeremy met me there to take the kids to lunch during my appointment. I told him where the nearest Chickfila and McDonald's were. And they were off.

My  appointment was depressing. I gained even more weight. No surprise. And I'm measuring a week bigger than I supposedly am. Great--I'm carrying a sumo wrestler. He'll need to be to survive around here, I guess.  And I'm carrying lower now--dr said that's about right, especially because my uterus got so stretched out with the twins. It's just expanding to how big it was with them. Which means I have enough room to carry this kid til he's 13. No thanks.

I texted Jeremy when I was almost done.

-I'm almost done. Where are you guys.
-At a Chinese Buffet.

Not what I expected. And the whole ride home the kids just screamed about how hungry they were. Even though they said they had ice cream with sprinkles and those cookies with paper in them. I called to ask Jeremy why they were so hungry after they had just eaten. Well, it turns out that the buffet was a great deal--only $14 for all of them. That would explain it--he said the food was pretty nasty. But the ice cream had sprinkles!
I need a Mexican vacation. Don't worry--I know all the pedals. 

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Ramblings: August ain't for sissies

Let me break it down for you. I go through this vicious cycle where I'm doing good at keeping this dang thing updated but then for one reason or another, I fall behind. Far, far behind. So far behind that the blog is a tiny speck in my rear view mirror. And then it's frighteningly overwhelming to attempt a catch up post that might possibly qualify for Guinness Book's "World's Longest and Most Boring Blog Post."

So...because I'm lazy and sitting in this "ergonomic" office chair makes my back hurt more than before I sat down, leaving me even crankier,  I'll do my best at hitting the high points and random thoughts during my heat-induced blog disappearance.

*Maddie turned 7 in July. She got an orange mustache for her birthday. She's apparently a little embarrassed about her colored facial hair.

* Jeremy was made partner in July and got a new spiffy office. Sounds fun, right? Partially. It just so happens that we had to furnish and decorate the whole thing during a couple of the busiest weeks ever. We were about to leave on a 10 day trip, Jeremy was in Hong Kong for a week, all the kids were home all day (have I mentioned that very few kids enjoy shopping for desks, bookcases, couches, whiteboards, etc.?), and I was continuing to have back issues that made walking feel like someone was stabbing me repeatedly in the lower back with some sort of crudely fashioned prison weapon.

Luckily, we finally found what we needed and in the past few weeks it's been slowly pieced together. I told him he should just drag in a whole bunch of huge boxes from IKEA and then be like "What? This isn't the kind of stuff you had in mind for a partner's office?" I do have actual pictures on Jeremy's phone but I'll wait until I finally get the family pictures up on the final wall until I show you.
I know. You're just on the edge of your uncomfortable ergonomic chair in anticipation. I will say--there's a shag carpet involved. Oh, ok. I'll show you. The star thingies are shaggy and I love em.
*Here are two pictures I'm considering enlarging for his office wall:

That about sums them up.
*We took a trip to Washington in July. We put about 1800 miles on the minivan we rented in Seattle. We got to visit with most of Jeremy's family--siblings included, which is a rare event (sorry to miss you Dave and Ciana).  Activities included: swimming, the peanut game, movies in the theater, birthday parties, basketball, and enjoying the COOL summer weather and fire-ant-free grass. The cousins got to run around and play and carry on in general silliness all night and day. How many cousins can we cram in one hot tub..? And luckily I think the Grandma and Grandpa's bed and breakfast survived our night there--and no toilets had to be removed like last time.
 

We spent the next few days at Grandpa Fielding's in the mountains of Oregon. Grandpa's got himself alot of land and horses--he's a cowboy at heart.

We all got crackin' to help the cowboy get his yardwork done. How could you not enjoy being outside in a place like this though...? And you see, Grandpa likes his BIG lawn looking dazzling. Meaning that we can't leave the cut grass on the lawn--so we raked, and raked, and raked (well, the boys raked. I drove the four wheeler with the grass wagon filled with some crazies behind me). And we hauled all the cut grass into a pasture far, far away. And Grandpa's several acres of lawn was dazzling at last. I'm not embarrassed to say that I was glad we weren't there two weeks earlier when they were stacking hay. I'll take the grass wagon over the hay baler any day.
Nothing hotter than a guy wielding a pitchfork in knee socks...

Do a good job, guys. Grandpa's watching!


There was still plenty of time for some monkey business...
 I'm not sure which set of brothers was more excited to get out on the basketball court. This little set of brothers...
or this much bigger set of MUCH more competitive brothers. That scream and yell at themselves when they miss shots. And play until they're covered in sweat and blood from diving on concrete. And make 'Your Mom' jokes throughout the game.
Here are Jeremy and his sibs (minus Ciana) with Grandpa and Grandma--and the slightly creepy cowboy that lives on Grandpa's porch. When we first pulled up into the driveway and the kids saw the creepy stuffed cowboy, they were sure it was Grandpa. "He's out there waiting for us!" In case you're confused, the real Grandpa is the one in the overalls.

*After a week, we drove back down towards Seattle for my grandparents 60th wedding anniversary/reunion at a campsite up in the mountains near White Pass. Yeah, that's right. I said CAMPING. (Although, is it really camping if they have heated showers?) Not only did we pack for a 10 day trip, we packed stuff to camp in the COLD mountain air. We had a great turnout and a great time.  60 years--now that's a long time to put up with each other! Each of my grandparents' kids and their families are color coded--navy, black, green, orange, blue, and red.


One of the best parts: I wasn't hot. Except in the sweltering kitchen. But outside--fabulous. And at night, it was COLD. Cold like your nose froze and you slept with as much of your body inside of your sleeping bag as you could cram. (For me that was fairly difficult. Did you know sleeping bags aren't really designed for pregnant people?) And so fabulously chilly in the mornings that I wore jeans for a few hours.  Also at night--chipmunks raided our tents and tried to crawl on our faces. Not as cute scurrying around in the pitch black as they are up on the tv screen singing "Me, I want a hula hoop." My little brother is still seeking therapy for his midnight chipmunk encounter. 
And y'all--I canoed. Stop that. Bite your tongue. No jokes about my largeness tipping the canoe--we remained afloat. And it's a good thing cuz that water was freezing cold.
The kids were glad we didn't give into their demands for cheap, flimsy sleeping bags with fun characters on them.  They figured out pretty fast how to disappear to stay warm. Although by morning they had wiggled out and looked like little caterpillars coming out of their cocoons. Alex apparently hadn't emerged yet.

We had a talent show one night in the amphitheater. I won't make you watch the relatively long videos we took, but Alex recited the Gettysburg Address that we bribed him to memorize and Maddie sang Love Story by Taylor Swift from memory. Acapella. Because Jeremy's ipod was dead and we didn't have the music on a cd. I was surprised she was so bold to do it in front of so many people. Jeremy was BEAMING. He grew up singing in front of crowds and he saw a future performer in the making.

We had an afternoon in Seattle before we flew back home to the heat. We took the kids to the aquarium, did some general sightseeing, ate some seafood, and shopped a little. It was actually freezing and since the kids stuff was packed and at the hotel, they each scored a very touristy SEATTLE sweatshirt jacket.

I discovered what kind of fish I would choose to be...this little guy had me laughing. It looks like he's wearing a full set of dentures and grinning from ear to ear. How could you not love this fish?

And that night I got deathly sick with fever, chills, and a headache that made me wish I could detach my head for a few hours. The sickness followed me home and lasted for another two weeks after it morphed into a sinus infection, ear infections, and then bronchitis. Ah, being sick and pregnant is a magnificent combination. All of the misery--none of the good drugs.

*Sunday Avery came up behind me and patted each side of my hips and said, "Wow, Mom. Your bum is sure getting big!" Thanks, dude. Just what I needed. 
*This August has been hotter than hot.  This is what I have to look forward to this weekend. Add that to the 50% humidity, and my deodorant doesn't stand a chance. 
*Our air conditioning stopped working last Friday at about 5:40 pm. I thought I might die. Within 20 minutes the temperature in the house rose 5 degrees and I started getting nervous. Luckily we were able to find someone to come out even though it was a Friday night. He got there at about 8 and had the thing going shortly thereafter--a blown fuse or something. But I fled at about 6:30 to roam Target while Jeremy waited it out in the inferno of a house. Once I got word that the temperature was below 80 in the living room, I came home.  I'm no hero, ok? And I'm fine with that.
*We still haven't thought of a name for the baby. And no, Baby Wiener will not make it onto the birth certificate. Any suggestions? Jeremy's starting to get anxious, but I figure sometime in the next few weeks we'll decide on something non-hideous.
* My back is aching from this dang office chair. I'll have to catch up more at another time. I'm off to go sit in front of one of my high-powered oscillating fans (in a very NON-ergonomic chair).

*Oh wait, my phone is ringing. Guinness Book's on the line. Hmm...I must be up for that award.